I want to start off by saying something about myself. I didn't plan on having my first child at age 40 almost 41. What I mean by that is not oh look my husband and I were intimate, I got pregnant and we were both surprised. We started trying to have a baby when I was 33 years old. We had a house and settled in our careers. It seemed like it was the right time. Little did we know that God had other plans for us. After a few years of trying and nothing happening we saw a specialist. The bad news hit us like a ton of bricks. My husband wasn't to blame and I wasn't to blame, we both had a problem. We went from fertility drugs straight to Invitro Fertilization. After paying as much as we would for a nice luxury car, we started on the procedures. As I tell everyone, it took seven years, three procedures and two miscarriages for us to get our little Froggie.
Pregnancy isn't easy for an older Mom. We worried about complications and Down's Syndrome. As a side note here, I skipped the amniocentesis since there was a risk of miscarriage and I wasn't going to take that chance. Also what was I going to do if the baby did have a genetic defect. I was still going to love that child with all my heart and just worry for the rest my pregnancy. Since I was over 35, I was considered high risk. I had to see a Maternal Fetal specialist. I will say the good thing about that was we had lots of ultrasounds. It was good to be reassured of some things.
The pregnancy went well despite the fact I came down with Gestational Diabetes. I was good and kept in check with diet and exercise. In the beginning of 2010, we had a rather large but healthy baby girl. My husband and I were thrilled. Our family was so happy for us. I was loving being a new Mom.
Not everything was coming up roses. Due to my fertility issues, my breast milk never came in. I was depressed that I was unable to breast feed. However, I learned there are definite advantages to formula feeding. Science has come a long way and the formula is much better than it used to be. I believe breast milk is best but I also don't believe anyone should be condemned for going with a bottle.
There are times I feel my age when it comes to my daughter, such as, when I read on Facebook about a person I went to high school is celebrating as his/her son/daughter graduates high school. I start to realize just how old I will be when Froggie walks across that stage to receive her diploma. I feel old when I realize that Froggie is closer in age to her second cousins then her first. Though nothing made me feel as old as I did when I went to Walmart when she was around two month old.
I'm standing in line and there is a cashier who looks barely 18. She might not have been 18 yet. I don't know because I didn't ask and I don't want to assume she was younger. Anyway, she remarks how cute my little one is and I'm beaming as I say thank you to her. Mom's often do this sort of thing. The good feeling was short lived when the cashier asked me, "How old is your Grandbaby?" I could have corrected her here but she would have felt very embarrassed so I chose not to. I just politely said Froggie's age. I couldn't stop thinking the rest of the day, "Do I really look that old?"
I don't know if I do or not. All I do know is that I love my daughter and as I told her this morning, I love her even when she gets me upset. I wouldn't change a thing. So here I am writing a blog that will hopefully help other older Moms be able to relate to someone. This is a blog for the over 40 new first time Moms and the Moms that thought they were through only to find out they were pregnant again. It's also for those out there that love and support them.
I'll share my experiences and try to give some advice. Hopefully someone out there reading this will feel a little less like, "I am the only one."
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